Category: Personal Essay


People usually don’t enter the kitchen in their house to cook but to hog the food kept in the cabinets and it’s safe to say that I belonged to that very category. Cooking was still a long shot, I couldn’t even turn on the gas without my mother’s help, and all of this piled on me when I got married at the frivolous age of 20. Most of my friends were studying while a few others were still trying to figure out what to do with their lives and here I was getting married, stepping into an undiscovered and new phase of my life.

The Little Things 0 (0)

“What’s the favorite time of your life?”, my friend had asked me out of the blue one day. A question like that really makes you wonder about your life and all the memories you’ve lived through in a very different way. All of a sudden, it’s as if your life is a movie and every moment you’ve ever lived now has double takes of emotions and drama. When I thought of this question with respect to my life, I could remember all the tiny achievements that I’d had when I was a little kid, like the fashion show I participated in dressed as a Malayali girl and how my mother made me learn a Malayalam phrase by heart so that I would get extra points.

A Symphony of Life 3 (1)

At some point of time in life, everyone wishes that some things could or should have ended differently.  No one can escape this inevitable feeling. Life isn’t fair, so it will surely bring such moments and people to you. There are many possible combinations of reasons that one can think of when talking about ways of letting others down. People can lie and mislead you for their own personal gains, or the best of intentions from both parties still lead to misunderstandings and create chaos. You may not get picked despite having all the qualifications and hence be let down by the system. Someone may steal from you or cheat you out of what is rightfully yours.  Someone may talk about you behind your back.

A Helping Hand 4.7 (27)

“Bhai nahi raha.”

I was staring at the message, trying to decipher the words again. Meaning, I got, impact, I wish I had. “What? Why? I don’t know what to say” just slipped off my fingers, sure to hurt him and haunt me. Really? How foolish of me! Another desperate low of my life! In my mind regretting the fiasco, I started wishing my reply would change into something more sympathetic before reaching him. I wanted him to know that I had concerns far more than what my silly text would ever communicate, without telling him so. But Alas! Telepathy or manifestation is not my biggest strength.

When My Second Life Began 0 (0)

At the end of my sophomore year, with a lockdown imposed, I couldn’t meet up with my friends as usual with school being  online. I had stopped talking to a lot of people. I didn’t text them or talk to them through calls and video get-togethers. It was a weird time. But I was also obsessed with Korean dramas as everyone was. So I didn’t really feel the need to maintain connections. 

Unraveling the ‘aporia’ within the self 4.3 (4)

When one begins to think of technology, the one thing that comes to mind is the accessibility of everything on our fingertips. One click and ten thousand things to scroll down brings in a lot of options to think about and choose from.For example, I enjoy baking and am always on the lookout for new recipes and a google search provides me with thousands of  mug cake recipes to choose from. The options are overwhelming in my mind and consume a lot of my time and energy. Having said that, I find the best recipe for a novice like me to begin with but the crucial thing is to be able to get my ‘sweet’ desired result along with a balanced time spent on looking for it on the internet. Hence, it is important to know and examine the relationship that I share with technology.

Challenging the ‘normalized’ theatricality of forgiveness 0 (0)

The world is full of binaries and we, as humans, are conditioned to compartmentalize things in our heads. The demarcation of things in black and white in a concretized manner makes it difficult to analyze the grey part let alone trace it. I get curiously reminded of Hercule Poirot’s “little grey cells” as the essence of thinking truly begins in it. For example, one person betraying the other in a relationship leads to heartbreak and eventually the conflict is ‘resolved’ only when the one who betrayed apologizes. The acceptance of apology normally results in a “patch-up” owing to the act of forgiveness. This is where the idea of conditionality associated with forgiveness comes in which includes the involvement of two participants-the victim and the guilty as a result of the impact of the Abrahamic tradition.