18-years old, body-conscious and shy, I set out to go abroad for further studies. It was the beginning of a new life. I had been told all these pretty stories about how one cannot get tired of London’s life. I believed London possesses everything that life has to offer. To some extent, it may even be true. But what I was not told was that there will be days when I will feel so homesick that I won’t be able to move, there will be mornings where the only courage I could muster up would be to open my fridge and eat ice cream for breakfast. Lucky enough, more often than not, I had days when I loved life and myself more. Maybe it was while dancing in the kitchen after cooking a half-broken meal that I realized how truly happy I was, just being with myself. For me, it was the start of a journey on the path of self-love after many years of living in self-doubt.

I was told that I will miss being home for the hundreds of festivals we celebrate and I did. I celebrated my first birthday away from home and I think I cried for more than half the day. But when it was time to go back home then my tiny student accommodation room and university library felt more like home than that house in Delhi ever did.

I made friendships for a lifetime, friendships that were not forced and friends that I never thought I would have the pleasure of having. Maybe I formed better friendships in those few months than I did in my entire 14 years of school life. I feel like I got to know myself better. I had never been this independent in my entire life. This one year made me feel like I had been living in a bubble before. Grocery shopping seemed so useless here and I hardly ever went but back in London, my trips to the grocery store were a stress buster. I would spend quite a significant amount of time after classes were over at the grocery store. I would try out new cakes, juices, fruits and candies. Sometimes, I would just roam around all the different aisles and go home.

I started exploring the city, as well as myself through it. I never cared much for shopping before, but there I realized that I enjoy shopping only when I am alone and going about it at my own pace. I was enjoying my company for the first time ever. However, little did I know that a global pandemic was about to put a halt to this new story in my life. It all came down collapsing when my father called me one morning in panic in March and told me that I needed to pack anything and everything that I could and I’d be on the first plane to Delhi the next morning. I was not ready to face this part of my life just yet, as I was just beginning to be consumed by the beauty of this new life. If only I knew that this new story may just have been a short chapter.

It took me two months to find myself back again at home in Delhi, bit by bit, in the same old environment which seemed brand new now. It has been a few months, and it is getting better, I believe. I think I will keep finding myself in uncertain situations as and when I start to feel too comfortable, which is intimidating yet exciting. Maybe I will be stuck in a safe space for now, but I cannot wait to build myself up again in the real world and discover previously unknown things about myself. I cannot wait to find out what is coming next.

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143 thoughts on “DELHI-26 TO L-TOWN

    1. Vivek Sood

      You’ll be an awesome story teller Suhana! It’s so natural and simple and at the same time effective and engrossing .
      God Bless you and wishing you many a many more accolades in the near future
      I’m your Nanu’s friend from Shimla

  1. Jahnavi Girish

    A very interesting read indeed and something that I’m sure ties together many people irrespective of where they come from in life!

  2. Abhay

    Amazingly articulated, and I’m glad that you’re still wanting more from who you are and trying to discover things about yourself!

  3. Sid

    A really inspiring story for everyone who wishes to explore new things but is afraid to step out of his/her comfort zone! Every day you learn something new and this story has expressed it beautifully.

  4. Girish

    You’ve just about mastered that.” My time “
    Solitude is the soul’s holiday, an opportunity to stop doing for others and to surprise and delight ourselves instead.

    Carving out a little solitude can make a world of difference. In solitude we discover what makes us feel alive. We can use our time alone to rest, in a complete and profound way, or we can engage in an activity that brings us joy. What a pleasure it is to dive into a project with no distractions, or to pursue our passions at full tilt

    So go ahead—give yourself a break.
    It’s that moment

  5. Shivani Dua

    So soo proud of you my Baby…… you have expressed your emotions soo beautifully and you definitely have a flair for writing !!There you go my girl .. Rise n Shine always! God Bless

  6. reema narula

    Lovely my child Suhana…beautifully expressed…well articulated..
    To explore oneself and life ..keep it up🥰👍👍

  7. Dinesh massand

    Loved it and you definitely have the innate ability to express your emotions in words…keep it going!!

  8. Taranpreet sarna

    This is so true and touchy as my son went thru the same feelings and I can feel what you are sharing …. you all are our babies and just starting to fly and in the beginning only this pandemic turned you back …. no worries our children getting stronger day by day and what your generation learnt & adapted at this young age , will always keep you strong throughout life ..
    God is kind to everyone and will always keep you warm & protected under his angel wings 😇

    1. Suhana Dua Post author

      Thank you so much Taran Aunty, for your lovely wishes and blessings. It means a lot to me <3 <3

    1. Khyberman

      That was a pleasing read Suhana! Well done! Things will get back to normal soon I hope and you will be able to continue the discovery of yourself. That said, now that you know how, you can do this anywhere in the world – even Delhi.

      My best wishes.

  9. Husna

    Love you Suhana ! Couldn’t relate more.
    We’ll get to go back to our new homes and find ourselves again🥰

  10. Sonia Gulati

    A very expressive write up. I feel this fear and doubt is experienced by everyone at some point of life, the fear of the unknown. You have shown immense strength to find your true self in solitude, exploring new places, making new friendships and loving your own self . More power to you. God bless.

  11. Dheeraj Goel

    Lovely Reading. The best Expression of feelings one could use to express their Emotions. So proud of you Suhana. Lots of love and blessings. May your Journey of life be full of happiness and May you achieve all that you desire.

  12. Gouri madan

    Written so beautifully… straight from the heart. Rise n shine SuhanA. The world is ur oyster. All our gud wishes with u sweetie😍

  13. Bhagyashree Ramchandani

    Superb Suhana👌. V intresting… This isvfrom Bharti your Mummas cousin from Mumbai

  14. Kavita Ahuja

    Beautifully written and articulated. You have the flair keep it going. So proud of you👌🏻👌🏻

  15. Ashwani Dua

    Craftily written/ Beautifully Expressed
    YOU GO GIRL❤️❤️❤️
    Lots of Love and Blessings

  16. Vimal kalia

    Lessons of life ..very aptly put ..simple narrative coming from the heart ..change,change, well described
    And the stress buster ,visit to grocery store…amazing

  17. Diljeet singh

    Hi Suhana,
    Your writing skill is fabulous. I am sure you will achieve great heights if you continue to pen your thoughts. Many a time we do not realise our true potential when we remain in the cocoon woven around us by our doting parents. If you had not gone abroad you would have remained in a narrow world, served by an army of servant never allowing you to talk of grocery. You have hit the right place. Wish God to bless you with ample opportunity to shine independently and discover the world and life in new environment on your own terms.
    Diljeet singh ( friend of your Nanu from shimla)

    1. Suhana Dua Post author

      Thank you so so much uncle <3 <3
      What you have said is very true and wise. Thank you for your encouragement.

  18. Alpana Goel

    Dear Suhana,
    You are a wonderful person who knows how to convert the world of thoughts into beautiful words. May you shine in whatever you do.
    U R D BEST.
    Lots of Love 😍

  19. Sana Dang

    Putting emotions into words is an art and you are surely on the way to mastering it. I am proud of you, love you suh.

  20. Manu Goel ( Denmark)

    Very nice piece. People are always afraid of opening up about their fears and true feelings about new things happening in their life. Nice to read an honest and relevant article for ones .

    Well done 👍❤️

  21. Jamal Syed

    Hi Suhana. I’m living alone since January for the first time in my adult life. I relocated to Singapore and Covid travel restrictions prevented my family from joining me. Believe me when I say that I’ve experienced every emotion and done every activity that you’ve written about so well. It’s almost like I’m reading about myself. We have our new life experience in common.
    Very well expressed !!

    1. Suhana Dua Post author

      Oh, I did not know that.. I hope you are doing well. Take care, hahah yes we have something in common now. Thank you so much uncle <3 <3

  22. Naveen Bhaik

    Was able to imagine what all you were doing and feeling out there. That’s what makes your post so interesting. Keep writing. Best wishes always.

  23. Vikas Chopra

    A simple straight forward expression of self discovery and self realisation beautifully penned. It’s only through the self we uncover the true belonging of the human soul and our purpose in life. Our extension to the world is from within and not from the outside to the inside as we sometimes come to belive with external conditioning we receive in our lifetimes. Self realisation to restarting again is only another chance for search within though not in the way you would have expected but nevertheless can be hacked for understanding one’s true calling even in these difficult times.
    So good luck to feeling life in its truest form, from within.

  24. SP SETHI

    Very inspiring story especially for upcoming generation intrested to set up their carrier in an innovative way.
    My elder son Alok has gone thru. the same phase couple of years ago while completing his masters in UK.
    The way you expressed your feelings has touched my heart and Iam proud of you my dear as Iam ur Nanu’s friend

    1. Suhana Dua Post author

      Thank you so much for your kind words <3 <3 I completely agree with you! Hope you are keeping well <3

    1. Ashok Kumar Goel

      Dear Suhana,

      Thank you for writing this lovely article, you brought my childhood and my children’s childhood memories alive. It’s so beautiful to relive the years through my grand children’s experiences. You are the best any grandparent/ parent could have asked for. We all Love you a lot. The flair of writing this essay is your true expression of feelings which are as beautiful as you yourself are outside and within. Very proud of being your Nanu, it gives me pleasure to see my friends praise you and I getting a new recognition of being Suhana’s Nanu. Lots of Blessings and Love. May you achieve whatever you desire and much beyond that too. ALWAYS be Happy !!

      1. Suhana Dua Post author

        Love you so much nanu <3 it is all your love and blessings that have brought me till here and will continue guiding me throughout life. Your beautiful comment has brought tears to my eyes <3

  25. Col RK Vasudevs

    Sunana dear Beautifully written, awesome, simple writing which is so intresting nd Engrossing. You will be excellent Story teller. As you will progress with time, will be famous nd maturing writer 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👌🏻Wishing you all d success in her life with fame, honour nd Awards -Nanu friend

  26. Anil.K.Sud

    Simple, inspiring, well expressed and beautifully carried piece of story telling. God bless you in this art of yours with profecency and actualisation. With affectionate blessings. I am your Nanus friend.

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